Parenting Matters: Doing it right with your new baby

Published 1:30 am Wednesday, April 8, 2020

By Cynthia Martin

For the Sequim Gazette

Having a new baby is a very exciting time. There are many things for you to learn about your baby but also to learn about yourself. So what do you need to know and what do you need to do to make it right?

First, take care of yourself so you can take care of your baby. Your moods and lack of energy can affect your baby. Tune into how you are feeling and try to keep it positive.

Let your doctor or your partner know if you have postpartum depression. This includes feelings of sadness, anxiety or restlessness. This can be difficult to handle without help. While you should not ignore your new baby, you also need to have breaks from her to rest and refuel.

Create a predictable world for your baby. Providing routines lets your baby know that he can depend on you. This allows him to spend less energy fussing over his needs and more time learning. Create routines for him to follow each day. Babies and older children thrive on this consistency.

Build a routine that suits your style. Before it is time for bed, you can read him a book. Even very young babies love reading and learn from reading a book at nighttime. You can also give him a bath that can be part of the regular night routine. Talk to the stuffed animals as you tuck him into bed. Certainly, hug, kiss, and let him hear you say “I love you.”

Make certain you provide a warm and loving environment. A baby’s ability to learn depends on her emotional well-being. A baby who is content and comfortable has an easier time learning about the world. On the other side, a baby raised in conflict and neglect will experience major difficulties in learning.

Be sure to respond to her. An infant cries only to let you know that she needs your help. Since you cannot spoil an infant, pick her up whenever she cries. This is not the time to try to discipline a child. She needs you to respond to her.

Show her you care about her by making eye contact (at about 8-12 inches away), holding her close or rocking her in your arms. These times together are important. They are times she will depend on. They are important times for you.

Spend time talking with her. You might be surprised how much she learns from the words you speak to her as a baby, a toddler and a preschooler.

Let your partner know of the importance of these times. Talk together about them so that both of you learn the information that makes parenting such an important event.

Just a silly side-note. Do you wonder how tall your newborn is going to be? Try this for fun to figure out the averages for your child’s growth potential that Baby 411 suggests. Like everything, some kids will exceed their potential and some will never reach it.

• For boys: Add 5 inches to Mom’s height and average that number with Dad’s height.

• For girls: Subtract 5 inches from Dad’s height and average that number with mom’s height.

But mainly, enjoy the time you have with your little one. This is a special time unlike any other.

Cynthia Martin is the founder of the First Teacher program and former executive director of Parenting Matters Foundation, which publishes newsletters for parents, caregivers and grandparents. To reach interim First Teacher Executive Director Patty Waite, email patty@firstteacher.org or call 360-681-2250.