By Cynthia Martin

Gift giving is wonderful. There’s real joy in unwrapping a package and discovering what’s inside. But after the excitement settles, an important moment follows — the opportunity to say thank you.

Gratitude is one of life’s most essential lessons, and it’s one we must teach our children early and often. Saying “thank you” when opening a gift is a good start, but it shouldn’t end there. A thoughtful thank-you note carries more weight, and it’s a habit worth building.

Yes, even in the digital age, handwritten or personally composed thank-you notes still matter. Some will debate whether email is acceptable or if only paper will do. In truth, what matters most is that the note is written, personal, and sincere.

Even toddlers can participate. A two-year-old can scribble or draw something colorful to mail to Aunt Tilly. A four-year-old can make recognizable pictures and, with your help, share what they’ve created. Can’t decipher the drawing? No problem — ask your child to explain it and include their words in the note. At the very least, have them sign their name or say what they want you to write on their behalf.

As children grow older, especially into their teen years, they may resist writing thank-you notes. That’s when the teaching becomes even more important. Help them understand why it matters. Explain that a note isn’t just about manners — it’s about appreciation, respect, and connection.

Aunt Tilly might not use email. She may not have a smartphone. A physical card is something she can hold, reread, and treasure. Let your child know that each person deserves their own note — this isn’t a group assignment. Each child should express their own gratitude.

And no, a thank-you note should not be a one-sentence obligation. Teach your child that it should have some thought and care behind it — just like homework. Review it with them for spelling, tone, and length. They’re writing to honor someone’s time, effort, and kindness.

What if your child didn’t like the gift? That’s a perfect time to introduce the idea of polite gratitude. There will always be gifts that miss the mark, but the gesture behind them still deserves recognition.

In truth, teaching thankfulness is no small task, but it’s a lesson with lifelong rewards. It shapes our children into gracious, thoughtful adults — and that benefits everyone. Even businesses know the power of a well-placed thank-you. It builds trust, respect, and goodwill.

Some might call thank-you notes “old-fashioned.” I’d argue that being grateful never goes out of style.

Speaking of which — did you send any thank-you notes this year?