When it comes time for your little one to take more responsibility, you need to look carefully for ways to do this right. In many ways when you first give your child chores to do, it might even be easier for you to do them yourself. Do not do this. Your child needs to learn about being responsible and you need your child to learn this skill.

We know the long-term consequences of doing chores. Studies have shown that children who have been given and completed chores as they were growing up became more responsible adults, had happier marriages, held jobs longer, and were less likely to be arrested for crimes (“Parenting with Purpose,” R.W. Reasoner and M.L. Lane).

The other positive outcome is that children feel good about themselves when their parent has this trust in them to be helpful. It also helps children when they feel they are helpful to you. Telling your child that it really helps you when he sets the table for dinner makes him feel proud of himself.

You want to make sure the tasks you assign are age appropriate. But very young children can help in small ways. As your child grows he can take on more tasks and also take on tasks that are for somewhat older children. Chores such as setting the table or at least putting out the silverware can be done by very young children.

Taking care of pets is an excellent chore for a child. Chores that help the family not just the child are the ones you should emphasize.

If you have more than one child, it can help to rotate the chores. This way no one child is stuck with doing a more difficult task or one that he doesn’t like to do.

Set up a specific time to do the chores. This way everyone works at the same time. This way one child isn’t doing something that looks like a lot of fun while another child is doing his assigned chores. Having a specific time also helps your child learn to do what is expected on his own. If he knows that it needs to be done by 3 p.m. he will ultimately just do it at 3 p.m.

When you assign a chore make sure you spell out when the task is to be completed, how it will be done, and what it looks like when it is done.

You may even find that it will be helpful to actually do the tasks with her for a few times so she really understands what is to be done.

At times it is worthwhile to reward for a child who does a really good job. Maybe he can pick dinner at the end of the week.

However you reward a child for doing a good job, remember to vary it. Try different strategies when old rewards no long work.

Don’t forget the praise that needs to come when tasks are completed. Talk about what a good job a child does of his chores when you are at dinner or when you are talking with grandma on the phone. Talk with your child about responsibility and what it means.

This is what your child is learning to be.

Your child needs to feel pride in his accomplishments.

Don’t forget to praise yourself for how you are making this important transition with your child. You are the key to its success.

Cynthia Martin is the founder of the First Teacher program and former executive director of Parenting Matters Foundation, which publishes newsletters for parents, caregivers and grandparents. For more information, email to info@firstteacher.org or call 360-681-2250.