Most parents look forward to the time their little one goes down for the night. It is a time the parents can relax, spend time together, maybe read a book or have some screen time for themselves.
However, bedtime for your little one may not always go smoothly. Some children really resist bedtime. Other children have gotten into bad habits that make going to bed difficult.
If you are having a struggle each night, take a look at a few things that make bedtime more difficult:
1. What is she eating before bed? This isn’t a good time to have too many sweets or anything that might cause her to be hyperactive. Snacks before bed can be something without a great deal of sugar. A piece of apple or a glass of milk are better than a bowl of ice cream.
2. How much activity is happening just before bed? If you are roughhousing and then expect her to go to sleep quickly, it won’t happen. It is time to do the opposite; have a quiet time before bed to calm her down.
3. Is your child scared or upset? Talk with your little one. See if she worries about anything related to going to bed. These kinds of fears are most likely to occur after some story or movie. Be careful what you share.
4. Is there too much noise in her room? If you have a child who is sensitive to noise, good luck. You need to make sure she is in a room quiet enough for her to sleep.
5. Are you putting her down because she is tired or because you are? Each child has a time they get tired. Make sure you are responding to her tiredness, not just because you need a break.
Making adjustments
So now we have looked at what you might want to change to help your child sleep. Let’s take a look at how you can make time for bed a special, happy time. You need to do a happy routine each night so she begins to look forward to it.
1. Run, crawl, hide and jump around with your child. These activities wear your child out and might help her get to sleep more easily. Don’t do them just before you put her down. Do them earlier, and then help her begin to calm down.
2. Give your child a bath. This is a great time to help her relax from the day’s activities. The main thing you are trying to do is begin the process of calming down for the night.
3. Let her have a snack. Plan ahead for a light snack that will help her sleep. This is only important if she is likely to wake up in the middle of the night and be hungry. If you can skip it, that is fine.
4. Have her pick out a book she would like you to read to her. Crawl in next to her in bed and read the book calmly, not hurriedly. Let her help in whatever way she can. Maybe she recognizes certain words she will say when you get to them. Maybe she can at least turn the page. If the book is really short, read a second one. If she picks out a book that you know is filled with too much excitement, ask for a second choice or pick it out yourself.
5. Talk about today and tomorrow. Spend a little time talking about what happened during the day, and then a bit about tomorrow. This can be a pleasant way to relax her for tonight.
6. Before you walk out, make sure she hears you tell her you love her. These are thoughts you can never say enough. Always make sure a hug and a kiss go with them.
Make sure that the next morning you tell her what a nice job she did going to sleep last night. Actually, this is something we all need to become better about.
Telling our children what they do correctly is frequently overshadowed by telling them what they do wrong. Here is a good way to begin to make a change; emphasize the positive.
Cynthia Martin is the founder of the First Teacher program and former executive director of Parenting Matters Foundation, which publishes newsletters for parents, caregivers and grandparents. To reach current First Teacher Executive Director Nicole Brewer, email nicole@firstteacher.org or call 360-681-2250.
