We all know that mothers are important in how a child grows. But how do fathers fit in and do they really matter? Let me tell you, fathers, just like mothers, always matter.

In the past, studies of the development of children almost exclusively focused on the child/mother relationship.

Today, we know that fathers play a special and important role in children’s development.

Perhaps the role of fathers is just as sensitive and nurturing as the role of mothers. Let’s look at some of the research that has been done on the importance of the father in raising children.

• Babies with secure attachments to their parents, mothers or fathers, were more likely to develop into happy, successful and well-adjusted children and adults.

• Babies formed attachments to their fathers when fathers were responsive to their babies’ signals for attention.

• Fathers who had secure attachments to their babies raised children who scored higher on tests of empathy (the ability to see a situation from another person’s point of view).

• Fathers who played with their toddlers taught them how to solve problems and how to get along with others.

• Fathers spend a larger amount of their time in play with their young children than mothers do and they are likely to be more boisterous and active in their play.

• Fathers who played with their toddlers are not just entertaining them. Through rough-and-tumble play, fathers create obstacles for their children and demand respect for limits and boundaries.

• Fathers challenge their children and encourage them to explore their own strength, their ability to do new things and their impact on the world around them.

• When fathers are good at playing with their young children, these children scored higher on tests of thinking and problem-solving skills.

• Fathers playing with their children helped them identify their own emotions and learn about the emotional experiences of others. When children understand their emotions and know how to control them, it makes them more popular with other children.

• When fathers were affectionate and helpful, their children learned how to get on well with their brothers, sisters and peers. These children behaved less aggressively.

• Children whose fathers expected them to handle responsibilities, such as carrying scissors, crossing the street or taking a bath alone, scored higher in tests of thinking skills. Learning to accomplish tasks at this age was important and fathers’ involvement was crucial.

• Fathers were an important help in developing a sense of industry or a belief the child can accomplish a goal or master a skill. This is the basis for the child’s self-esteem. One reason that fathers have such an influential role at this time was because they tend to challenge their children to try new experiences and to become more independent. Challenged children have more opportunity to develop problem-solving skills.

• Fathers usually had a positive influence on their children’s sense of industry, competence and responsibility.

• The influence fathers had on their children’s intellectual development isn’t limited to helping with school work. Fathers had a positive influence on their children’s thinking skills by participating in social activities and sports as well. Children, both male and female, whose fathers encouraged them in sport and fitness activities were more successful in school and in their careers later in life.

• The more actively involved and interested a father was in his children’s care and education, the more intellectually developed his children were.

• When fathers were supportive, their children had fewer problems at school such as poor attendance or failing exams.

• For children with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), supportive fathers had a stronger positive influence on their adjustment to school than mothers.

• Adults whose fathers were highly involved when they were children were more tolerant and understanding and engaged in more socially responsible behavior than those with less involved fathers.

These are just some of the ways fathers really make a difference. A study done at Harvard’s Business School of women enrolled in the program found that the one key factor for almost all of the women was the influence of their fathers.

Hey Dad! You are really important. Don’t screw up. Your children need you.

Cynthia Martin is the founder of the First Teacher program and director of Parenting Matters Foundation, which publishes newsletters for parents, caregivers and grandparents. Reach Martin at pmf@olypen.com or at 681-2250.