The best kept secret about being a parent is that it goes on forever.

Yes, this is the best kept secret. But it is something we should remember as we have each child. Most of us look forward to the next stage, whatever it is, in parenting. We do it almost as if there was a specific series of things each parent goes through and then it is done. Wrong. It is never done.

When your child is born, you become excited when he lifts his head or turns his head to follow you. You love it when he smiles in response to when you smile at him.

But soon you are on to the next stage and you are delighted when you see her reach for a toy or play with her hands by touching them together. Now she can hold her head upright without you holding her. She can even laugh out loud now and she is only 6 months old.

In stages

As he gets closer to his first birthday, you are amazed to see him standing or even sitting without you helping. He can feed himself at least if it is finger food. He even lets you know when he wants more.

By 18 months, she is walking alone and even saying words like “Mama” or “Dada” or something else. She feeds herself with a spoon and can drink from a cup. She even knows the difference between parents, familiar people and strangers.

As he approaches his second birthday, you will find him walking up and down stairs when you hold his hand. He can scribble with crayons and move his body in tune to the music. By now he loves storybook pictures when you read him a book. You are truly amazed at his expanding vocabulary. You really feel he is on his journey to becoming an adult.

As she nears 3, you will have to run to catch up with her. She can tell you the different parts of her body. She even uses 2-3 word sentences regularly and can answer your questions about what she wants for lunch.

Between 3-4 years, he is mastering climbing, throwing, jumping and running. He thoroughly enjoys playing with other children and loves it. This is a great age for him to be in preschool. He asks “why” and “what” questions. He can even wait for his turn sometimes.

As age 5 approaches, she can hop on one foot and even practice tumbling and rolling around. Her drawings may even look like a face when she wants them to. Most of her speech is fairly clear. She continues to like to play with other children and that time gives you a break.

By age 6, he is into throwing and kicking a ball. He can dress himself but may need some help with zippering or snapping. He enjoys playing organized games with other children like Simon Says or tag. Kindergarten is a source of great excitement for him.

Moving on

In a brief period of time she will be entering middle school and things begin to sound far more academic. Friends continue to be important and in fact are becoming more important. She is starting to seem much older.

Then it is high school for him. You have a sense that things are coming to an end as his growing continues. You are now making plans with him for what happens next.

Other people have entered her life as she begins dating. You feel parenting is almost over.

As he gets married and begins a family of his own, you think you are done. You aren’t. You are just entering a new phase of parenting. Now your children have different questions; questions about what house they should buy or what should they do with the baby when she cries. These are all new things to teach, new lessons to learn.

Remember, we said parenting goes on forever. Enjoy today because tomorrow comes quickly.

Cynthia Martin is the founder of the First Teacher program and director of Parenting Matters Foundation. Reach Martin at pmf@olypen.com or at 681-2250.