We know that parents are the first teachers of their children. A child watches the people who are close to him, and he learns lessons about everything from words, about objects, about animals, how to play games, about cleaning up after play, about anger and sadness, and an unlimited number of other things.

He learns about life from his grandparents, his childcare person, his aunt, and anyone else who he is in contact with. His learning begins long before school begins.

Unfortunately, he learns bad things by watching, too. He watches when you do things that you don’t want him to do. One thing that he sees is way too many parents and their friends smoking. We know that two of every three children between the ages of 3-11 are exposed to secondhand smoke in the United States.

We already know that secondhand smoke is associated with physical health problems in children. Even the mental health side of smoking is coming under study. But maybe the most harmful part of parents smoking in front of their children is the example it presents for their children to eventually become smokers. At the same time, we know that close to 12% of adults smoke (The Week, April 5, 2024). Some 2% of high schoolers smoke — but that number is growing. While that number of smokers is large it doesn’t consider the number of children who will be impacted by the example of today’s current smokers.

More and more studies point to the harm of secondhand smoke. New studies published in the Archives of Pediatric and Adolescent Medicine show that children who breathe secondhand smoke are more likely to struggle with mental health problems, especially hyperactivity and “bad” behavior.

We also know that more than 5 million deaths each year are caused by smoking. A study from the World Health Organization (WHO) reports that another 603,000 deaths are from secondhand smoking.

Reports like these are an important signal for parents to quit smoking or at least smoke outside the home. What we know now suggests you consider the impact on your children before you pull out a cigarette.

We need to look at the many lessons we give to our children each day. Are we the models we hope to be for teaching our children to have the healthiest and safest behavior?

Anyone who is around a child becomes a teacher for that child. If your little one sees you having unhealthy snacks before mealtime, he learns that is okay. If you watch television most of each day, don’t be surprised if your child thinks it is okay for him too. If you talk poorly about others, your child is likely to do the same. Although you give positive things for your child to copy each day, you still need to be careful of the other examples you present.

Cynthia Martin is the founder of the First Teacher program and former executive director of Parenting Matters Foundation.