Parenting in Focus: Weeds, work and words

Published 1:30 am Wednesday, August 13, 2025

By Cynthia Martin

For the Sequim Gazette

The sun is out more often now, the chill of winter finally having given way to warm, blooming days. Trees and flowers are in full color and the air smells like summer. So here’s a question: what are you still doing inside?

This is the season to step outdoors, get your hands a little dirty, and — most importantly — share the experience with your child. Whether they’re a curious toddler or a skeptical teen, working together in the yard can be one of the simplest, most rewarding ways to connect.

Most yards have at least a few weeds poking through. Show your child how to use a weeder. (Yes, even the littlest hands can help if the soil is soft.)

As you work, talk about what you’re doing: how weeds can take over if left alone, how you’re giving space for flowers and plants to thrive. Let them feel that they’re part of something important.

It might take longer than doing it alone, but this isn’t about efficiency. It’s about building skills, confidence, and connection.

You need to make the yard theirs. Plant something together. A flower. A vegetable. Even a tree. Make it their tree. Let them water it, check on it, and proudly watch it grow year after year. You’re not just planting roots in the ground — you’re planting them in your relationship.

Not every lesson has to happen with a shovel in hand. Look around and talk. Take a short drive and notice what’s changing around you. New construction, blooming trees, gardens in full color. Talk about what you see. Even if you live in an apartment, you can appreciate the care others have put into their yards and use that to inspire conversations about beauty, effort and care.

Every conversation adds to your child’s vocabulary, their curiosity, and their sense of belonging.

Children today spend more time behind screens than ever before. While some screen time has its place, it’s real-world, real-time connection that sticks. You don’t need grand outings — just time together. Clean off the porch. Wash the car. Take out the recycling. Talk about your day. Let them help, even if it’s only a little.

And at the end of the day, talk again. Tuck them in with a conversation about what you did together. Praise their effort. Tell them what it meant to you. These small things build trust, self-worth, and lifelong memories.

So, bring out the weeder. And while you’re at it, bring out the hose, the broom, the picnic blanket — whatever gets you out there together. This season isn’t just about growing plants. It’s about growing people.

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Cynthia Martin is the founder of the First Teacher program and former executive director of Parenting Matters Foundation, which published newsletters for parents, caregivers and grandparents.